February – Page 3 – Creative Meanderings

A trip away to Malta

General, Meanderings Abroad, Photo Journeys No Responses »

Feb 102022

Now that we are somewhat settled in our house, and public conversations are starting to return to logic with an acceptance that the “C” is not actually going to kill off the human race, we decided it was time to take a holiday.

It was a shock to realize that I had not been on a plane since arriving in Europe 15 months ago. I never would have imagined that I could go so long without air travel; however, thanks to the freedom of movement in the EU, I haven’t been completely one-country-bound. Plus, I admit to having some fear around flying with security measures tightened, people milling about, wearing masks for extended lengths of time, etc. etc. It is not so much that I had any fear around getting sick, but that people’s fear of it would cause an air of extra stress that I didn’t feel the need to expose myself to unnecessarily.

M had said after a few solo flights that everything was really straightforward and easy, so I figured I could test it out for myself. Malta is a short flight from Rome and part of the EU, so it was a good test trip for seeing the process of air travel at the moment.

As promised, it was easy peasy lemon squeezy. Aside from a few extra online forms, which I can manage comfortably, it was actually smoother and less stressful than pre-C days. The only challenging aspect was the early rise to drive to the airport, park the car, and wait for boarding – both directions. So, my travel bug has been nudged again thanks to our little weekend away.

In any case, let me share in pictures our trip to Malta. We were there for three nights and had one full day touring around with one of M’s old friends, who is Maltese. The sun was shining and there was a lovely vibe all around the place. Although it is a bit run down, we really enjoyed the energy of the country.

We said that we would visit again, but – to be fair – we often say this about places. Next time, we might stay in another area of the island that is a bit more modern, though Valletta is an interesting historical center and beautiful. However, there are so many places to explore now that I cannot say when our next visit will be…. With that said, if you ever have a chance to go to Malta, I highly recommend it – when the sun is shining!

~T 😀

Silence is Golden?

Going Mental 2 Responses »

Feb 232021

So, I did it. I submitted an application for a ten-day silent meditation retreat in response to my need and near insanity from being stuck in a small cottage where the walls and doors are more like paper.

My introverted self is suffering a bit from the constant sound of my husband’s voice as he works and uses a lot of ‘words’ throughout the day. Even if I put on headphones, I still have to turn on sound to drown out his chatter, which defeats the need for silence and calm.

Thus, I have my fingers crossed that I will be accepted for this retreat even though it is in May.

Most people think this sounds crazy and people I have spoken to about it say that it is a challenging experience. I am wondering how it will be for me as a lover of quiet and being inside my head. My challenge will be in not being able to write or read when I want an escape from my thoughts or the world. However, I think not having so much distraction around me might not create reason for the escape.

Anyway, stay tuned for when I find out. In the meantime, I am practicing each morning in trying to build up my meditation time as I generally only give 10-20 minutes in the morning after my yoga. If I find out that I am going, then I will start building up my practice even more.

For now, though, it’s proving to be enough to enjoy a few golden moments of silence at the dawn of each new day.

~T 😀

Midnight Musings

Going Mental No Responses »

Feb 092021

It’s the middle of the night.

Despite going to bed at my usual time around 9 pm, and shortly falling asleep well before 10 to settle in for my evening slumber, I awoke briefly around 10:30 upon hearing my husband on the phone.

It’s not uncommon these days for him to stay up a bit later, or to rise early, for a phone call as his work connects him with people on various time zones.

However, nearly an hour later, the bed was still empty. So, I called him to bed in hopes of being able to nestle in for my desired sleep….

Yet, here I am at nearly 1:30 am, while my husband snores away, after attempting for the past two hours to lull myself to sleep through social media surfing and reading, taking in the quiet of the dark night.

Lately, I have been craving silence, and to some extent solitude. The 10-day silent meditation retreat I keep on my ‘to do eventually’ list is becoming less fearful as a daunting experience, and more attractive as a salve to a self-inflicted wound.

There is little to nothing to complain about where we are. I mean, how can one be truly discontent surrounded by vineyards in “mostly” sunny southern France?

It’s not a matter of contentment, but more of a need for nourishment like the soil craving the rainfall after a drought. As an introvert, being constantly bombarded with sound and another’s presence – even when it is the one I dearly love – is draining and overwhelming. Add on to that the daily activities of work and building a media platform.

I need peace and quiet. I need calm and tranquility. I need stability and sanity. I need to recharge, refresh, and replenish my internal fuel cells – alone.

All of these needs are hard to meet in a small, barely two-bedroom cottage where the stone walls are paper thin when a daily bundle of energy storms around filling the air and space until it is almost suffocating that the only escape is often, to escape.

Sometimes it feels like there is not enough air to breathe for two when it is supposed to be shared. Lately, I feel a bit as if I am gasping and grasping into an unknown dark abyss and just barely floating through based solely on trust and faith.

Like all things, this too shall pass. Like all things, the dark of night exacerbates the speckled holes of a sunlit life. Like all things, there is a silver lining.

Perhaps, I should embrace the quiet of the night and make the most of the wee hours to myself. If I cannot find my peace and calm during the day, maybe I can change my own pattern and expectations – until something else presents itself as another option. Maybe, my body and mind are telling me something and I shouldn’t fight the opportunity that is before me….

And, possibly, I should look into that retreat…. 😛

~T 😀

Kindness

Going Mental 2 Responses »

Feb 282020

Last weekend we took an overnight road trip to Gifu Prefecture. As a UNESCO World Heritage Site, I have wanted to visit here for some time. It’s not along the typical tourist path, so I never quite made it before.

Thanks to some usual, but unexpected traffic getting out of Tokyo, we had a late arrival on Saturday, but we explored the nearby town, Hida-Takayama, which is popular for wooden pieces and it’s sake breweries in old-style houses.

On our way there, we had to cross the Japan Alps, but found that there was nothing really to worry about in our city car. It’s been a rather warm winter and so neither of us had thought to look at the weather report or worrying about our drive. Although, once we saw snow on the hills on the way there, we did lament about not at least bringing along our snow gear in case we had thought to stop for a quick swish-swish down a slope.

Still, we drove along enjoying the pretty views without a care.

Upon awaking the next morning, our excitement at seeing heavy snow fall quickly melted into tentative worry about our drive home. Thus, we headed off to Shirakawa-go without haste.

It was fun despite the chill to walk through the village and see the thatched-roof houses from days of old. We stopped for a ‘local coffee’ and watched the people go by taking in the traditional wintry scene.

Satisfied with our explorations, we prepared for the long journey home. Sadly, we had not prepared enough for the continually falling snow and our little city car with little city tires.

Most cars in Japan have winter tires that help them in all types of weather and terrain. As car-share participants, not owners, we tend not to think of such things. So…sure enough one slippery hill caused the little car to protest. We attempted to burn our way up the hill in hopes of at least getting out of the middle of the road, but the little engine that could, couldn’t. One of the challenges of being in a foreign country is the added stress of not knowing what to do in such situations. Also, it was a car-share rental, so there was only a protocol listed for accidents….

Therefore, I put out my spidey-senses and willed someone to stop to help us. This is not a country of good samaritans for the most part. However, a kind old batty man stopped to help us. He explained that there was no way our car was going to make it back to Tokyo in the current weather conditions. He stated we had two options: 1) buy chains; 2) call a tow truck and wait for at least an hour or more with a hefty bill to go with it.

Obviously, since NOM (nice old man) was willing to drive us to a gas station to see if we could buy some chains, we chose that option. It’s been a long time since I’ve had to use chains or drive in snow, but I felt confident one of us could figure it out. My gregarious husband did not let on that he had, in fact, never driven in snow nor touched chains before in his life. Luckily, his hubris covered until we were well on our way! 😛

I think the NOM had a sense that we “city-folk” were at a loss, so even though we gave him the equivalent of about $50 for taking us 12km round-trip, he also helped us in the cold to get the chains on and see us on our way.

Everything went smoothly and we made it through the rough patches. It only added on about an hour to our long journey and we managed to laugh our way through it all; so in the end we can share it as an experience and adventure!

What was rather strange about the whole thing was that we were just talking about how it never hurts to just be nice to people. There are plenty of times when we feel like we don’t have patience with others, but small acts of kindness build up good karma. Inevitably, we will be dependent on the kindness of others and want to be extended it, so we should always be in the state of mind to do the same. So, our sentiments were reinforced by NOM. 😀

Next time, though, we vowed to at least make sure we knew what to expect weather-wise. Plus, now we have chains that will fit most city cars – just in time for spring! 😉

~T 😀

Prose Ode of Love!

Going Mental 1 Response »

Feb 142020

Six years ago I went to an Internations event to avoid being lonely and sad at home after breaking up with my five-year boyfriend during the winter holidays. Just a week or so before that I had gone on a private retreat to reset my sights on attracting a partner who would be all I needed him to be – right down to a checklist (obvi!). 😛

Although I had not planned on meeting this potential partner so soon, the Universe works quickly when you put out what you want. Never before had I met another adopted person randomly – usually it would be at events for adoptees or introductions from others. Never before had I met someone so quick-witted and genuinely charming.

Even though neither of us were necessarily looking for love in that event or moment of our lives, we found a connection.

While it seems like more than six years since we met, it’s also a reminder at how short life is and how quickly our circumstances can change; our own time together so far can testify to that!

Some may call us lucky to have found each other. Some may think that it can never happen to them. Some may even wonder at how it all happened.

For me, I believe in the power of knowing what you want, being clear about it – make a checklist! -, then keeping your mind open enough to see it when it is provided to you.

Also, I don’t believe in coincidences or luck. Sure, I could be writing this about someone else depending on the timing or circumstances, but I’m not. While we may have had different lives to lead until we met each other, the alignment of our stars finally happened. Life hasn’t been all roses and sunshine together either, but being able to share it with my crazy “babs” makes it our adventure.

So, on this day of love, I celebrate having it in my life in the form of my laughing life partner. 🥰😍

Aspiring Inspirations

Going Mental No Responses »

Feb 182019

I have always hated being asked Who inspires you and why? It’s always sounded like a cliché question and a kind of judgment since most people annoyingly say The Dalai Lama or Mother Theresa or some other icon of sycophants’.

Sound cynical enough for you? 🤷🏽‍♀️

In my reality and view of the world, I think independence and self-determination includes not looking to anyone else to motivate or ‘inspire’. I believe these should come from within us, then it’s more achievable.

I might pedantically accept the phrasing of Who do you aspire to be like? over the former.

What’s the difference? you might be questioning…. lemme ‘Tara ‘s’plain’.

It comes down to the source for action.

Aspiring to be like someone means that one must work within themselves to emulate another whom one looks up to. Being inspired by another is a passive act. The grammar alone proves that. Aspiring is active. But, you have to be inspired from an outside force to take action.

So… no one inspires me really.

That question will always vex me because I have never been extrinsically motivated to take actions in my life. However, if I ever were forced to choose someone, I believe I finally have a name that I might tentatively share, though the fear of falling into a cliché would likely stop me. 😛

Reading Michelle Obama’s book _Becoming_ is the reason I have a possible name. She came from a middle class family and acknowledges the opportunities that were not only placed before her, but also those she worked to make for herself. Through hard work and being a decent human being, she touched lives and has made a difference in the world.

The frequent saying that the best leaders are those who don’t want to be is one that I would absolutely apply to her. Though she makes it clear that politics was never her thing, once she moved into the spotlight, she shone bright and guidingly.

While not everyone liked the Obama administration, just like many do not like our current one, I always try to avoid making much of a political statement. I believe these kinds of conversations are only safest amongst the very nearest and dearest to keep the peace. I respect everyone’s point of view even if I strongly disagree, but this isn’t always the case for others.

So, I do not feel inspired by Michelle Obama because of the politics connected to her, but rather for her determination to be the best that she can be and to help others to do the same. She may have had a leg up compared to others like her, but still she worked hard along with her husband to become who they are today.

It is this fact that moves me as a humanist, who believes that every person has the opportunity to be anything even those in seemingly dire circumstances. Sometimes, it is easier for some than others, but we can all be more than we are if we want it to happen.

Therefore, while I liked the public persona that she presented before I read the book, I like her even more after reading her story. It’s a shame more people like her and her husband don’t get to share their stories as examples of inspiring human beings.

Thus, if I haven’t made it clear, I highly recommend this book. It’s put me on the path for aspiring to find inspiration in others. 😉

~T 😀

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