Sep 072020
 

It is becoming popular to say “2020” sucks because of COVID-19. It is becoming acceptable to complain and then blame it on the year that so many claim has not happened nor looks like it will before 2021 arrives.

I am curious to know if there is a common introverted vs extroverted response to the evolution of this year, or if optimists react differently than pessimists.

As a realist, here is my take.

The abnormality of this year has been like hitting the pause button on a movie. As someone who actually gets overwhelmed by all the motion and noise of the world, this pause has been like going figuratively out into the woods to take a long deep breath of fresh, clean, pure air.

So, when I hear all the moaning of the noisy minority I think I feel a kind of personal affront to who I am because to be perfectly honest, this has been an amazing year for me. I will be remember 2020 as the year that the world stopped long enough for some of us to take a long deep breath.

In a way, we have seen a division in personalities.

There are those who have told me that all the negative realities of the world are overwhelming them mentally and physically that they are struggling to face the days. There are those who have told me that they feel trapped by the lack of travel or free movement. There are those who have told me that they are bored with their lives because they cannot “do” anything.

My response to those who are overwhelmed by the negative realities because they tend to spend the majority of their time on social media or watching mass media feeding their brains with all the negativity: turn off the noise!

My response to those who are feel trapped: exercise, plan an amazing trip for next time and save up all the money you can now so that when the freedom is returned you don’t look back and wonder why you didn’t prepare for travel and moving again. Be proactive and prepare!

My response to those who are bored: get over yourself and DO something for others. So many restaurants, organizations, programs are struggling. Look them up and offer to DO something or donate if you’re one of the lucky few who has the income to do so. There are a million things to DO in a day that there is really no excuse for this statement.

Now, before my reader says, but: Do you follow your own responses? I preemptively respond with a YEP. And, though it may mean I have to toot my own horn, here is what I have been doing that addresses these perspectives.

1. I have screen time set to turn off every day from 7pm to 5am and it’s off all day on Sundays with the exception of one or two apps that I might use or that I use with my family in case something comes up. I also look at social media twice a day for a max of about 30 minutes or I look for the sole purpose of the magazine to get more followers or contributors. None of it is allowed to be processed too deeply on a regular basis. I do not watch or read the news, so most information comes via word of mouth or an occasional headline that I might see.

2. I admit that this is a little unfair in that we are preparing to move countries and so I have this to look forward to sooner than most. However, as someone who is used to traveling every few months, it has been a challenge. Instead, I have focused on building up our savings account and ensuring that we have a fund to splurge out – plus that fund is allowing us to not stress over the big move.

3. Aside from starting the magazine, I have donated to a homeless organization, used smile.amazon.com to support a ‘charity’ organization every time we purchase something online, bought from local venues, sent random gifts to others, made gifts for others, and more. So, despite not being an overly charitable person, I have made an effort to push myself to be more generous.

I’m not trying to sound arrogant, but I am trying to say that I am no one special and there are numerous times in my life when I could have said that I prefer the path of darkness, self-pity, anger, bitterness, and wallow in the murky waters. I could have found a number of people to support that way of thinking and to tell me that I deserve to feel that way. However, as Robert Frost wrote: I chose the road less traveled by.

To me, it’s the easy and lazy way to go with the belief that life sucks. It’s simple-minded to say 2020 is the worst year ever or to blame a year – which has no personified qualities whatsoever. Instead, it takes character, integrity and strength to find a path forward that inspires and leads to the best version of who I can be. I want to look in the mirror every day and be satisfied with the person looking back at me instead of dodging the mirror altogether or playing a negative tune at the reflection.

We all have the ability to be and do more. Just do it – one step at a time.

Feb 182019
 

I have always hated being asked Who inspires you and why? It’s always sounded like a cliché question and a kind of judgment since most people annoyingly say The Dalai Lama or Mother Theresa or some other icon of sycophants’.

Sound cynical enough for you? 🤷🏽‍♀️

In my reality and view of the world, I think independence and self-determination includes not looking to anyone else to motivate or ‘inspire’. I believe these should come from within us, then it’s more achievable.

I might pedantically accept the phrasing of Who do you aspire to be like? over the former.

What’s the difference? you might be questioning…. lemme ‘Tara ‘s’plain’.

It comes down to the source for action.

Aspiring to be like someone means that one must work within themselves to emulate another whom one looks up to. Being inspired by another is a passive act. The grammar alone proves that. Aspiring is active. But, you have to be inspired from an outside force to take action.

So… no one inspires me really.

That question will always vex me because I have never been extrinsically motivated to take actions in my life. However, if I ever were forced to choose someone, I believe I finally have a name that I might tentatively share, though the fear of falling into a cliché would likely stop me. 😛

Reading Michelle Obama’s book _Becoming_ is the reason I have a possible name. She came from a middle class family and acknowledges the opportunities that were not only placed before her, but also those she worked to make for herself. Through hard work and being a decent human being, she touched lives and has made a difference in the world.

The frequent saying that the best leaders are those who don’t want to be is one that I would absolutely apply to her. Though she makes it clear that politics was never her thing, once she moved into the spotlight, she shone bright and guidingly.

While not everyone liked the Obama administration, just like many do not like our current one, I always try to avoid making much of a political statement. I believe these kinds of conversations are only safest amongst the very nearest and dearest to keep the peace. I respect everyone’s point of view even if I strongly disagree, but this isn’t always the case for others.

So, I do not feel inspired by Michelle Obama because of the politics connected to her, but rather for her determination to be the best that she can be and to help others to do the same. She may have had a leg up compared to others like her, but still she worked hard along with her husband to become who they are today.

It is this fact that moves me as a humanist, who believes that every person has the opportunity to be anything even those in seemingly dire circumstances. Sometimes, it is easier for some than others, but we can all be more than we are if we want it to happen.

Therefore, while I liked the public persona that she presented before I read the book, I like her even more after reading her story. It’s a shame more people like her and her husband don’t get to share their stories as examples of inspiring human beings.

Thus, if I haven’t made it clear, I highly recommend this book. It’s put me on the path for aspiring to find inspiration in others. 😉

~T 😀

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