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There’s nothing quite like a physical purge to reset the mind. **TMI Warning**⚠️ Yesterday I was continuing my inner rage, which I’m sure was reflected in my somewhat negative energy being emitted to others. M decided to fuel the rage with little comments. One in particular sparked a confused response of anger, frustration, and truth – ‘you’re so negative about everything, maybe you need to reflect more on that’! 🤬😳🤯 First of all,…
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Making an Effort
Some days I feel as if the struggle is more real than others. Some days there is no real struggle at all, in fact. However, when climbing up out of a depressive cycle, the struggles can feel like mountains. On the outside, I think I am fairly well put-together. Even from my partner, I try to hide the tears that occasionally threaten to ooze out of the sides of my eyes (though he…
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Bringing Light and Leaving the Dark
There are few things that trigger my negative psyche these days. Thanks to meditation, reading a lot of books for reflection, and general maturity in life through experiences, I always look inward before letting myself get absorbed by other’s actions or words. Introspection is a daily habit rather than a passing whim for me. So, when I feel injured by others, I really feel it. It has been a long time since I…
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Puppy Love, C19 and the Psyche
Two weeks ago, I had this moment of darkness where I could not see any light in my world and I closed my eyes not wanting to see it in others. It has been a while since such dark moments have passed over me, but when old traumas are triggered one can never really know nor be prepared for. It was in that space I saw myself potentially getting sick. It wasn’t that…
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Head in the Clouds
Ever since I was young, I have had a fascination with the clouds. Not in the sense that most kids have in trying to create shapes out of the formations and imagining stories as they morph their shapes floating across the sky. Rather, in the sense that there are worlds above them and in them. Depending on their size, scatterings, and density I pondered what God, the Creator, or the other gods were…
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Ode to the Misery of Allergies
Oh the sniffing, the sneezing!Thankfully, I’m not yet wheezing. It’s that time of yearwhen being outside causes fear. How long can I lastbefore the final pollen is cast? I try to stay upbeatnever wanting to admit defeat. But, alas, I cannot keep up the fightas my puffy eyes decrease my sight. I cannot pretend anymore it is funnythat my nose is always runny. So, it’s back inside I go losing again to nature…
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“Home”
Yesterday, I participated in an interview for someone doing research on the adoptee diaspora and was struck by a few thoughts stimulated by her questions. One of them is around my concept of ‘home’, which is a recurring question in my mind. Coincidentally, or not, I had just been talking to my brother for an hour before this interview. It’s the second time this year and already twice as many times as previous…
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Returning to Normal-ish
I love to travel. It seems like an obvious thing to say as an expat, but there are expats who live abroad and see the world and there are expats who live abroad as they would in their home countries. I am of the former. Despite this love of travel, I detest the process of getting from destination to destination, especially by air. Even before C19 forced a return to isolationist practices and…
Creative Meanderings
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