May 042023
 

It’s been a great week of almost normal walking. I’m still a bit of a hobbler when it comes to stairs or when I’m tired toward the end of the day. However, I’ve been green-lighted to go without the crutch in familiar terrain and home. So, all is well.

I will do a full reflection on this whole process next week as it has been a rather amazing ten weeks or so. Overall, I think that it has been quick and fairly painless, but it hasn’t all been lovely either.

Anyway, just wanted to close out the week with this – we stopped to take pics in a gorgeous poppy field!

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

Apr 282023
 

Last week was the last of the two-crutch walk, and on Monday this week I was OK’d for just one crutch to hobble on. In actuality, I could mostly hobble along without, but there are those moments when the terrain is uneven or unpredictable, so the crutch still helps.

It’s been satisfying to be getting around. M has gone off again for a few days and I kept the dogs with me this time. Plus, I am able to drive into town and around without any difficulty. This has really helped my motivation and sense of confidence in returning to normal life. I’m still not able to do a long drive as the lack of movement makes it sore, like when sitting at a restaurant. However, the short drives around town for appointments and errands is perfectly fine.

So, with a taste of regular life again and having successes in each day with the pups, I feel more like myself again. The extra peace and quiet with M gone has definitely helped as well since I was starting to get a bit frustrated with life.

I am expecting that next week I will be OK’d to go without my crutch and the weather is improving that I might be able to get myself to the pool for my physio exercises. In the meantime, I do my yoga stretches and try not to do too much – though that is a challenge.

Anyway, all is looking good overall. Another week down!

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

Apr 212023
 

Don’t let the picture fool you – my foot does not like to be confined to a shoe! ๐Ÿ˜

However, there has been progress. Two days of physiotherapy down with some pretty significant swelling that has been deemed normal for the situation reveals that the body is truly something strange and amazing. Trying to do some yoga poses on the wall has dismayed me as I found what used to be so simple and easy to be a struggle. My brain really needs focus and concentration to rebuild trust in the movements and positions.

Still, I can put more weight on the right foot. Not quite full weight, but it is definitely improving each day. With more exercises and another three-visit week ahead of physio, I am hoping that this time next week, I’ll be writing standing on both feet equally. ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿฝ

In the meantime, slow and steady wins the race, right? ๐Ÿข

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

Apr 152023
 

Progress at last! After two months since the fall and nearly six weeks since the operation, week 5 at home was one of anticipation as I have started to become bored with being incapacitated on two legs. Although there is still patience required, I can see an end to the wait for life to return to “normal”.

The doctor(s) have given me the green light to start putting weight on the ankle/foot, do more intense physio to walk and return to light activity, drive even, and whatever else I can do within reason. The joy is real and my eagerness is on edge, but I am trying not to go too crazy.

The bandages also came off today. The pic isn’t pretty, but it is looking good.

So, now I am mindfully stepping with the help of my crutches. I have only once or twice put full weight on the foot, but that is still a ginger action since there is still bruising on the bottom of my feet and around the ankle. Plus, the muscles are not quite ready yet. I get a bit of swelling in the foot and toes if I do “too much” so I keep an eye on it and remind myself to rest as well.

Each step is one towards a return to freedom and regular life again, so I continue with a smile and bolstered hope!

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

Apr 062023
 

Well, my doctor’s visit on Friday last week went positively. They took out the remaining stitches and pins/staples giving us a week off from our next visit, so in two weeks I’ll return for another check up. In the meantime, I will have regular physio appointments closer to home.

My physio sessions are starting to get more intensive as increased mobility and flexibility in the ankle and leg muscles for that area need to be stimulated after nearly six weeks of being unused. It is something odd to observe what used to be a fairly healthy and toned muscle waste away into flabby skin and zero resistance.

The therapist said that it takes 100 days to recover from trauma. This is the case regardless of whether the trauma is mental, physical or a combination of the two. A physical injury carries mental trauma even if we do not realize it.

I tend to think of myself as pretty strong mentally and my physical health is fairly good, but it really is unexplainable the toll that is taken on the mind when the body fails to work as it should. Although I do not fear re-injury or doing something that could cause something else to go wrong, I am aware of a greater imbalance in myself than before.

It takes a lot of mental acrobatics to get myself going each day thanks to the extra effort required for showering, dressing, and getting downstairs or preparing to do something productive for the day. By the time, I am “ready”, I generally feel exhausted and have to push myself to keep going. Using the knee scooter definitely makes a difference from the crutches as I can move around to clean up the kitchen or pick up things here and there since a man-clean is not quite the same as a Tara-clean. ๐Ÿ˜…

Still, I feel impatient to get back on my feet.

Each day, I push a little more than I probably should to exercise my ankle to be in the right position for standing or stretch the toe muscles so that when I get the green light to put weight on it, I’ll be ahead of the training game. Of course, I understand that it is very likely that there is “beating” the game in this case, but at minimum I feel as if I am making the effort and doing as much as I can.

It’s hard to accept that I am only about halfway through the recovery process, but at the same time I hardly feel like it was only three and a half weeks ago that I had surgery. So, with the slow there is the quick. No doubt, in another week or so I will be forgetting that I couldn’t walk. ๐Ÿ˜ฌ๐Ÿคช

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

Mar 232023
 
Healthy bone-healing smoothie

As someone who likes consistency, it has been an interesting process to accept that each day is different from the one before. Some days I awaken with a lot of energy and focus while others I find myself extra tired and unmotivated to do much. However, this week I did decide to create a kind of schedule for myself to tentatively follow each day to start to rebuild my stamina and productivity levels as I am about halfway through my non-weight-bearing period of post-surgery recovery.

When friends heard of my situation, many have advocated the intake of protein and collagen to help the healing process. In the sunnier seasons, I have been a big fan of smoothies as a way of increasing my protein intake since we try not to eat too much red meat these days. As part of the smoothie ingredients, I do usually add in plant-based protein powder, green juice powder, collagen, homemade peanut butter, fruit, banana, yogurt, and other goodies as I find them. I’ve started adding in some orange juice to ensure my vitamin C intake is good and then include coconut water for the extra electrolytes. All blended into a delicious concoction that I hope is contributing to my overall health and now healing process.

This week, I did get myself out to a cafe on the day of my physiotherapy session. It wasn’t the most comfortable to sit with my leg on a chair, but it felt good to do something “normal” out of the house. Also, this evening, we are looking forward to having some friends over for the first visit of the spring and since my return home. So, I am very much looking forward to that.

Our fingers are crossed for my doctor’s visit tomorrow in that they will hopefully start removing stitches and staples as everything feels like it is closing up – though I haven’t checked as I’m not brave enough to take off the bandages at home. ๐Ÿ˜… If that all goes well, then…we should be able to get the go-ahead to spend a few days in France where we want to get our rental apartment there set up for visits and visitors/guests who might want to use it since holiday season is fast-approaching.

So, little by little, life is slowly returning to a more hopeful normal. We are starting to make plans again for socializing, entertaining, and activities especially with the weather improving. I am fairly confident that once I can put some weight back on the leg, the road to full recovery will be smooth. Here’s hoping! ๐Ÿคž๐Ÿฝ

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

Mar 162023
 

Well, it has been almost a week at home and there have definitely been some ups and downs. Thankfully, we are mostly on the ups side – literally and figuratively.

I was not fully prepared for the amount of energy it takes to move around with one useless limb. Plus, all my mental energy seems to be going toward healing rather than on more intellectual pursuits, which makes it hard to focus on writing, reading, or doing anything remotely productive.

Luckily, the weather has improved, so despite a bit of a chilly wind, I am able to sit outside to get some natural Vitamin D and try to return some color to my skin that was depleted from three weeks indoors.

Still, being a sort of burden to others is not something I excel at. I’m used to being independent and thought of as useful. However, just trying to change the sheets on our bed took me 30 minutes or more yesterday. Obviously, I did it out of choice and stubbornness more than anything else.

The doctor told me to stay mostly bed-bound with leg raised until we go in for a checkup tomorrow. The stitches and staples still need time to heal up. The physiotherapist told me to try to sit up more and get the blood flowing so that independence can be gained faster. Seemingly contradictory commands makes it hard to know what is the right thing to do. So, in the end, I listen to my own body and mind. I do mostly keep myself half-sitting up with the leg raised above my heart as I do not want to prolong the healing of the operated area from healing up. My physio will go faster and easier then. From my first two physio sessions, I think my body is doing a good job of making use of my healthy lifestyle and remaining strong, flexible, and agile.

Thus, overall, despite a bit of adjusting with the other member of the house on how to navigate my lack of movement with his own, it has been a good week. No matter, what it is better to have a view from my balcony than of the TV screen from a room of isolation.

Hopefully, the healing will be satisfactory after our doc visit tomorrow so that I can continue to make good progress back to the world of the walking!

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

Mar 102023
 
Pre-surgery

Well, two weeks later, it’s done.

I was gone from my room for over nine hours, and the docs said it took more than four hours to put my ankle back together through three insertion points. There was some talk of recreating ligaments and pulling of the skin, which explained the very uncomfortable pain I felt the next day.

However, two days later, I have yet to have any more pain medication and rocked my first crutches walk down the hallways. I imagine it is my determination to get home as soon as I can that is pushing me through.

The foot is still rather swollen – especially when it has been down a bit for a walk – and my blood pressure is low from lying on my back for 17 days, but there is hope on the horizon.

No specific dates or days can be given for recovery, but the next phase is a number of weeks with no weight-bearing activity. So, that means more time in bed, but in my own bed with a mix of sitting up, lowering the leg, and keeping it lifted, etc.

Overall, my spirits are good. I had one day straight after post-op when I questioned my sanity, but after a second day with less pain and doing nothing but watching, I felt motivated today to make more progress.

Will keep updated here on how things progress.

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

Mar 012023
 

Well, if you don’t follow me on social media, then you’ve missed the exciting news of me dislocating my ankle and breaking the leg bones surrounding the area. ๐Ÿคช

It’s been 9 days now since it happened on a walk with the pups, who decided to take me with them on a scent-run. Only problem was that my legs could not keep up and apparently, my ankle was not in the flexible mood. ๐Ÿ˜ฌ So, after a few screams and choice words breathing through the pain, I managed to crawl to a signal with my phone to call a nearby friend and M in the UK who called the previous owner (L) of our house because he lives closer. With the help of L, I got an ambulance and taken to the ER at Orvieto Hospital.

Unfortunately, or fortunately ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿฝโ€โ™€๏ธ, the orthopedic ward was closed due to C19, so I had to be transferred to another hospital, which was in Spoleto – almost 2 hours away. Before being transferred, they popped my ankle back in place – ouch! – and put on a temporary cast. I was told I was definitely going to need surgery. The fall happened just before 5pm, I arrived in Spoleto at 11pm with the belief that I would undergo surgery quickly.

Three days later, I had had no surgery, gotten a new cast that required a painful further adjustment of the ankle, been fed some interesting food, and no clear idea of what was happening. The doctor aggressively questioned me about where I wanted to have surgery – as if I should know that when I didn’t even know why it hadn’t happened yet!

In the end, we clarified that surgery had to wait and so I could get it done in Orvieto with a stay at home in the meantime. Happily, we checked out of there!

While on the road, I was informed that I should check into Orvieto the next morning for scheduled surgery on Tuesday.

However, the owner of the yoga studio I have been attending is an orthopedic physiotherapist and recommended a private clinic in Rome. She said I would get decent care through Orvieto, but the follow up care would be more challenging that I could avoid through the private clinic. So, luckily, I was able to speak with the doctor in Rome before we went to the hospital in the morning and decided to go with the private option instead. That was Saturday.

On Sunday, I checked in and here I am still as I write this post. The quality of care if excellent as I sit in my private room, have a small team of nurses, regular visits from the doctor(s) to check the status of my ankle – still no operation as swelling must be at a low before they feel it is optimal -, regular options of my menu, and that always desired yet never fully appreciated element of time.

My view these days…

So far, I have been keeping myself busy enough, though my positivity waxes and wanes more than at the start. Two weeks in hospital with another likely ahead does not make a happy and content me, but nothing else is to be done.

Instead, we now focus on new plans since most of what we had organized has changed. Even after surgery, I will be bed/sofa-bound for at least a month and then many more months of physiotherapy, etc. before it will be back to “normal”. So, it is one day at a time and literally, step-by-step.

Funny how life can change in a single moment, but alas that is for another post. Here’s to the new month and new plans ahead!

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

Dec 232022
 

I wrote this as a draft for another article I was going to submit, but realized it was a bit too personal to share on a non-affiliated space. ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿฝโ€โ™€๏ธ There is some repeat from an earlier post last week, but in any case, I thought I’d put it here for record-keeping and, well, this IS an affiliated space for my personal musings. ๐Ÿ˜ Also, as this is the sum of my reflections for my regular new year’s planning as I’ll take a wee break from writing for a week or so, consider it my 2023 resolutions post. โค๏ธ


To be perfectly honest, my reflective behavior is usually focused on myself and only myself. ๐Ÿ˜œ Although this might sound enviable (or extremely self-centered) to many who struggle to embrace self-care, self-awareness, positive self-talk, etc., it really isnโ€™t all that itโ€™s cracked up to be.

For me, my introspective nature is an attempt to better myself as a member of society, a participant in my community of friends, a wife to my husband, a daughter to my parents, a sister to my brother, a writer to my unknown readers, and a representative to my fellow humans. In this attempt at self-improvement, as defined by the transcendentalists of 19th century America, comes a sense of exhaustion – quite the opposite to the goal our 21st century idea of โ€œself -โ€ promotes. 

So, as I reflect on the past year or so with the return of an adjusted-way-of-life post-COVID19, I am setting new goals for the next year – to be more SELFish. WHAT?! (a collective gasp might be heard).

I know – controversial, right? 

Let me clarify from the start, I will never be selfish to the point that it hurts another individual or at the expense of another human being (or animal, for that matter). It is not in my nature to be intentionally harmful to others; thus, it would not actually be selfish for me to behave in such a manner. Rather, what I mean is that my actions and activities this year are going to be focused on what benefits me as a person. Instead of reflecting on how my actions, thoughts, or words might be perceived or affected by others, I am going to consider how they affect me first and foremost.

An example of how this will play out is in my writing. For years, I have been writing for my own private audience of one – me! Although I do have public spaces like social media or a blog (or two or three), I do not advertise them outside of a subtle link on a profile page. In general, I prefer to work quietly from behind the scenes such as on The Universal Asian or my Medium page. However, this year, I will be focusing on building up my own space as OSH, where Iโ€™ll be sharing my own writing, services for Book Coaching and Editing, plus a subscription-based newsletter called OSHโ€™s Letters where I will write to subscribers and share my worldview on the day-to-day experiences discovered on my journey through living on this planet. Much of the latter is still in the works, but do feel free to check the spaces often or go ahead and subscribe on the form provided to stay updated. See how my selfish act(s) work here – a shameless plug for my site(s), but no harm done, right?!

Other ways that this selfishness will play out for me is going to be in spending more time doing yoga and meditating regularly. Although this falls into a โ€˜self-careโ€™ category, I also treat it as a self-ish time out for only me. It may be at the expense of others in terms of my available time to them, but rather than seeing it as harmful, I consider it helpful that there will be boundaries and by me taking this time for myself, I can be more present and purposeful when I do give others my time.

Also, Iโ€™m taking a page out of Tim Ferrissโ€™s Four-Hour Workweek:  Life is now and I can live the lifestyle of a millionaire without having to actually be one – though I wouldnโ€™t complain if that happened! Basically, after a summer as a revolving door of visitors to our new home in Italy, I am closing our open-door policy so that we can have time to travel ourselves. Although I fully enjoyed our visits, it was draining and we did not get to do our own exploring of places. Therefore, doors will still be open, just on a more structured timeline.

So, you see, itโ€™s not that self is to be hyphenated this year, but rather it just is itSELF.

Hereโ€™s to an amazing year to the SELF.ย 

~T ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ‰โ™‹๏ธ

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